Living in the age of a young adult, study the science of knowledge from the unseen world of Ālam al-Ghayb wasn’t really my interest. Though I had previously been groomed by my father in the Islamic deen, but what I did not know was that I am destined for a greater mission.

I have met with my spiritual awliya guru who lived far away in the remote area of the east coast of Malaysia. We used to drive all the way there on the weekend to listen to his speech and attend his classes. Just two days there and back to Kuala Lumpur. Every two- three month I will repeat the visit again.

We went east to seek the knowledge, studied and practiced. We came back to town and we worked for another month. I had so much energy to enjoy life and as well as listening to spiritual talks. I have both material and spiritual equally balanced. My destiny was written for me to read a long journey, to unfold the answer to my existence.

In 1998 I had a dream. It was very uncomfortable to tell but I did not deny that I was ignorance and stupid.
I saw a lightning from the sky, struck me in such a painful aching that I died. O God.
What was my great sin until the lightning bolted and killed me? What pleasures of life did I had for this painful death?

That’s when I heard voices from many people around me, like I was at the ceremony. I heard they sang. Suddenly came the Iblis (Satan) devil carried a piece of paper with him. He showed the PAPER (Note) to the people around me and said, my name was written in his record that he came to claim my soul.

I was trembling. This was a horror event.
I heard all their conversations but there was no power for me to come back to life. The devil had written my name and my soul to be claimed. In such a chaos, the people suggested that they wanted to check my blood.
I felt like a deep painful needle sting into my heart. They saw my blood flowed white.
They said, ‘this woman is a white-blood human’.

That’s all I heard about me.

The devil finally did not succeed in possessing me so he went off. I was shocked from a scary dream. Masya Allah.

My heart was beating fast, like came back from a horror death.
Why am I the white-blood human?
Well, dreams about BLOOD are often associated with symbols pain, patience and the innermost feelings. It also means painful purification. Blood too carries the meaning of a spirit vehicle knotted in the old generations as the GATE to open the key to spiritualism.

Rarely do humans dream of white blood.

I believed that the white blood symbol is a sign of purity of my innermost feelings (my heart).
I was born with a LOVE-shaped birthmark on the left side of my face, it is a white-blood strawberry stain. Usually, strawberry stain is RED blood but mine was WHITE.
I smiled and wondered if I was a fairy-tale before. It doesn’t matter now who I was, as long as God guided me through this long journey ahead of me.

I prayed, that not a single day passes, to my fall into the trap of satan, who tried very hard to luring me into their world.
O Allah, make me a pure woman and be sanctified by You. Do not released me into the hands of satan and his kingdom.
Lighten my path O Allah, so there’s no power of darkness came after me from the dark realm.